Flashbacks for doomsday

♫ Lee Hyun - Senseless Me

I was broken down into tears today. Doomsday. PMR is on next week so Form 5s' got to pack their things and move to Form 3s' classes. My class was moved to 3 Oriole, the class where I was studied in when I was 15. Just a step into the class, my heart got hurt. Too much. I saw the seat where I was seated last two years. I looked around the ceiling, walls have been repainted, the classroom has became lighter than two years ago. Flashbacks started from this moment.

I saw the 15-year-old me sitting at the place where I was supposed to be seated, chit-chatting with my friends happily. I can see Seow Ying, Michelle, Khong Kar Wai, Chee Cheng and Kai Sin chit-chatting happily with me. We were laughing for something. That was Pasca-PMR, which means at that moment we had sat for our PMR examination. Then suddenly, I can see Kylie entered the class and Seow Ying, Michelle, Kylie and I were singing SHINee's Hello, holding lyrics. Few seconds later, I saw Kylie and I dancing Hello, Chee Cheng and Seow Ying were recording us. Then, not much longer, I saw another moment. The classroom looks dark, lights were switched off and doors were closed. That was the moment Khong Kar Wai, Kai Sin, Chee Cheng and I skipping a talk that held in the hall. We stayed in class chit-chatting about the planning for celebrating my 15th Birthday. Then I saw Kar Wai went out and Eleen came in. I saw myself ran and hide under some tables when Eleen came in because I thought it was a teacher. Kai Sin did that too, but she hid behind some chairs. Eleen laughed and Tan Kar Wai came in. Kai Sin was suddenly gone. Now there's only Tan Kar Wai, Eleen and I. Three of us played chess together. At that moment, the sight became blur and I heard some noises. Oh, that moment had changed to Pesta Ria moment. It was the first year that we had for organizing Pesta Ria (Funfair) and Form 3s' were in charged in playing games. Every class got to make their classrooms into a game stall and students will be waiting for outsiders to play the games. I saw Khong Kar Wai busily guarding her game stall, her ping-pong ball game while Michelle and I were guarding the duck-fishing game. I remembered the way Michelle and I served those "customers" especially there was a moment some teens came in and we played happily, Kar Wai was playing with us too. Suddenly, blackout. I saw nothing but someone's singing. Lights were switched on and I saw Pui Kei and I sitting at my place singing our "Chao Phraya" song. The Pesta Ria moment had gone. So, I can see Michelle, Seow Ying, Chee Cheng and Kai Sin laughing like mad cows when Pui Kei and I sang our song. We created that song, creatively. Then, I felt dizzy. I saw back all the moments that we have had in this class. Happy moments, sad moments were just kept on refreshing in my mind.

When it came to a stop, I realized that I was actually standing in front of the class, holding my bags, like stunt for a while. All the Form 3's moments had gone and all I can see is my Form 5's classmates busying arranging their stuffs in the class. I saw Chee Yin asked me to sit at a place which was far from the place where I usually sit during Form 3. Clearly I could see that I'm no longer Form 3. Classmates had changed. I was stunt that I couldn't believe that those moments I have had with my friends during Form 3 were just flew away like been blowing from a strong wind.

I put down my bags and stuffs, sat down and started to feel my heart as if it was broken into pieces. Tears started to flow out from my eyes, I really can't believe it, the moments... I cried for a period, approximately less than half an hour. I knew that classmates around me were shocked to see me crying suddenly except Seow Ying as she has already knew that I'll think back those days..

We had to stay in the class for more or less, a week, to wait for the Form 3s' to finish their PMR. At first I couldn't think how am I supposed to stay in this class for the next few days as I'll be thinking back old moments. Morning, tomorrow morning, I knew that I'll think back old moments when Shy Teng, Kar Wai and I used to be the earliest student to reach school, we were usually sleeping in the class. Alright, I just can't think of those old moments anymore as I know, life have to continue no matter what happens. I just hope that I can bear the burden of being thinking back the old moments..

By the way, this is what true friendships are. A person who can do such stupid things like me, like today, as happened. Here's a short video which I found out. I made it when Form 3.